i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize