So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
