You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
