Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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