In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
