My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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