Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
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