Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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