Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
im holly from the hills drunk
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
So much Jack, so little girl.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
