wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
