TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
