I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
