She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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