I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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