so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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