dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Randomize