Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
