She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
