And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
