I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
