ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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