There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
my being single is dangerous.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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