so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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