I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Just high enough for therapy.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
