Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
