Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Everclear isn't food dammit
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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