i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Two words: blizzard sex
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
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