I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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