The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
