Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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