At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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