4 words: hood of his car
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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