I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
