I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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