the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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