I'm sorry my penis didn't work
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
