...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
