So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Randomize