Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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