Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
