It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
