oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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