How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize
