All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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