so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
