It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
