I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
3 2 1 whiskey
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize