she was so not down for the gang bang
I am puke
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
no more duck duck goose at the bar
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
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