no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
