How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
